What we read while avoiding the George Washington Bridge…
We’re baack. I don’t know how often we’re baack, but who cares about petty details when there’s dead murderers running around Rosewood impregnating characters’ mean-spirited older sisters? And when Danby is recruiting Emily for its nationally renowned swim team???
I tried not to think of my last three months as life without Pretty Little Liars so much as life with The Killing and Parks and Recreation and any number of cheap knockoffs of the greatest show on television. It failed, though, and now that PLL is back, it’s officially prime television season.
With an especially boring slate of Big Monday games—has it ever been worse than this year, for some reason? The Big East and Big XII are good, but man, I can’t remember a good Big Monday game all season*—I had time to watch Pretty Little Liars at its regular hour this week. And even to rewatch some prior episodes during its all-day Presidents’ Day marathon.
*You heard it here first: Neither Syracuse nor Villanova will be playing past the NCAA Tournament’s first weekend.
That’s right: I’m recommitting myself to PLL full-tilt until the season finale in a few weeks. And Monday night’s episode, “The Bad Seed,” has me, well, ambivalent about that commitment.
Let’s explore why:
Does the reduced frequency of my Pretty Little Liars’ reviews reflect perhaps a taming of my zeal for the show or a latent unhappiness with the second half of the first season?
I want to quell such worries now. Sure, the last few episodes — including the last two — have not been as transcendent as I came to expect each week’s offering to be. But I’ve grown to appreciate the subtle genius on a week-to-week basis. It’s kind of like watching Tim Duncan in 2011.
I, for one, was nothing short of stunned to see that last night’s episode wasn’t Valentine’s Day themed. In fact, there wasn’t a single mention of V-Day. I suppose they didn’t know the air dates when filming, but these days, every show seems to put out a Valentine’s Day special. Part of me was happy to see PLL buck that trend, and part of me wanted to see what it would have looked like.
Let’s look back on “Je Suis Un Ami” and “The New Normal”:
In yesterday’s Pretty Little Liars recap Tim called the opening line of The Outfield’s “Your Love” his favorite opening line to any song ever. He even dared me to come up with a list of songs topping it.
Well, in the immortal words of Barney Stinson…
And I have bad news for you, Tim, “Your Love” doesn’t even crack my Top 50.
Of course, the topic raises several tricky questions: What constitutes an opening line? The first complete sentence? The first rhyming couplet? Until the first pause? And what criteria should we use to evaluate “the best” opening line? The catchiest? The most memorable?
I ended up being pretty flexible on both questions. Some of these lyrics were chosen because they are legitimately great lyrics. Others were chosen because of how they’re sung. Others are chosen because they are the most iconic moments of great songs. I’m sure I’m forgetting some great ones (I had only one day, chill out!), but here is an initial draft of the Top 50 opening lines in music history: Continue reading